I won’t give up that ghost

Another end to a tired week.  This crazy new life I have wears me out.  Not only have I added all this new responsibility of watching babies but I’ve started volunteering at least once a week if not twice at Emma’s school.  I feel like I have a full time job.  My new found stress reliever, running, has been sidelined by my body turning against me and so I start to feel overwhelmed.  Add in a dash of PMS and I’ve just given you the recipe to become Lord of the Ultra B’s.  Poor Dan has been great and trying to help.  I feel bad for how much he gets it taken out on him.

The week before last was a real challenge.  I was able to run the Monday after the Bridge run but when Wednesday came for me to run again, my right knee and ankle were wonky.  I still don’t know what I did to them but they were punishing me greatly for whatever it was.  I wish I did know so I don’t do it again!  But I don’t so the odds are great, I will.  10 days went by with me not able to run and everyday that ticked by, I could almost feel my muscles atrophying.  All the progress I had made in the last 6 weeks of training, flushed down the toilet.  It’s frustrating to say the least.  I’ve been trying to do core work with the exercise ball since I couldn’t do anything aerobic.  But since it’s a no impact regimen, it’s not really good training for a half marathon.

Thursday, I felt good enough to give it a go.  While my desire to run further was high, I knew if I didn’t want to become a gimp again, I needed to take it easy.  I ran a lazy 1.5 miles nice and slow.  I can’t believe how much it hurt though!  Geez, it was like starting all over again.  All the fun was gone.

Today is Saturday and as always, our big runs.  We are starting to taper in our training for the big race in 2 weeks so it only called for 9 miles.  Megan, Cheri & I made plans to meet at Megan’s and run the trail out by her.  It’s flat and would probably be best for my jumping back into the game.  I was happy I was able to go but apprehensive about re-injuringmyself.  Would I be able to run that far?  Would I put myself out of commission again if I did run that far?

Here’s the dilemma… I need to train.  I can’t possibly run 13.1 miles without doing both the endurance runs on Saturdays and the maintenance runs during the week.  But everything I read says to go slow getting back into it.  Don’t just jump back into the same amount of running.  How much is too much though?  Where’s the line?  Unfortunately, I don’t seem to know it without crossing it.

This whole running world is a new dimension to me.  I might as well be on Mars for all the knowledge I have of it.  I think I was just starting to enjoy it and start getting good at it and then the first injury (runner’s knees) hit.  The remedy?  Rest & ice.  A week of no running gone from that.  Then this latest injury.  Who knows what it was/is.  But I could tell, the remedy was rest & ice.  Ten days later, I’m better.  But that’s a total of 17 days of no training.  17 days of not running in an 8 week time period.  That’s a lot of mileage that I missed in my training.

So I ran today.  It was so hard at first.  It breaks my heart a little because it feels like I’ve lost so much ground.  While Megan & Cheri are at the level I was at, I’m behind now.  The first 2 miles today were tough.  I felt out of my groove and like a novice runner.  After that, it felt better but it was hard because I’m not conditioned the right way anymore.  It’s frustrating to say the least.  I ran a little over 8.5 while they did 9.

And now I wonder, do I continue the taper that the schedule calls for or do I do a little more?  I have never ran my 12 miles because I lost that Saturday run from this last injury.  I never ran 11 miles because I had the Bridge run that was 10.  I almost think that it would be smart to run 12 this Saturday to mentally prove to myself that I can.  But do I run the risk of injuring myself a week before my goal?  It’s times like this, I wish I had a running coach to guide me.

I wish I had the answers.  But I don’t.

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About Chris

These are the pieces of my life and those that make it worth living
This entry was posted in Girl Time, Half-marathon, Me, Other Peeps, Running, Stuff that ticks me off, Uncategorized, Woe is me. Bookmark the permalink.

2 Responses to I won’t give up that ghost

  1. Tracy Kinney says:

    i don’t think you should try to get in 12 before race day. even if you did 8 or 9 again next weekend, you will be fine. the adrenaline of the race will carry you. my training guide never has us go beyond 10 at all…i think you will be ok. i know its frustrating though.

  2. Duh says:

    Time to buy a bike.

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