Yesterday, we were driving to Costco to pick up pies for Thanksgiving. I had woke in the middle of the night with a fever and spent the morning in bed trying to get better. By 2, I had given up hope of that and decided that those pies weren’t going to wait for a healthy me. We piled into the car… the kids looking adorable and me, looking like death warmed over. I felt like pooh but couldn’t help but have my spirits raised when I heard this conversation unfold.
Emma: “Gerrit, I need to talk to you about your ears”
Emma: “You know you don’t really have elf ears, right?”
Gerrit: “Yes I do!”
Now, this was news to me. I hadn’t heard anything about elf ears yet but apparently, he’d mentioned it to her before.
Emma: ” But Gerrit, elf ears go up to here.”
Gerrit: “Nuh ugh, not baby elves ears.”
Emma: “Right, but you’re not a baby.”
Gerrit: “Well, not kid elves ears too. And I’m a kid.”
Emma: “But Gerrit, elf ears are pointy at the top too. Your ears curve around like mine and mommies.”
Gerrit: ” Well, mine point a little.”
Emma: “No Gerrit. Yours are curved like this” moving her finger and drawing in the air. “All people’s ears curve like that and elf ears are pointy not curvy.”
Gerrit is obviously not liking how this debate is going so he decides the diversion tactic…
Gerrit: “Emma, it’s elves not elf. Mommy, Emma’s saying it wrong. She said elf and it’s elves.”
I jump in to explain the proper use of elf vs. elves. Then remove myself from the conversation.
Emma: “Gerrit, you really don’t have elf ears.”
Gerrit: “Yes, I do. Stop talking about my ears, Emma.”
Emma: “But Gerrit, if you had elf ears you would be an elf. Then Santa would take you for rides in his sled. But he doesn’t cause you’re not!”
Gerrit, getting pretty upset now: “Emma, I said stop talking about my ears! I asked you 2 times now!!”
The whole scene quickly took a nose dive from there. I stopped my silent laughter when Emma told me (as punishment for his yelling at her) that next time they have a sleepover, she didn’t want to sleep next to Gerrit. He started crying because he thought that was so mean. I played the role of mediator, brushing aside the whole issue of elf ears. But would it be so bad for him to believe he’s just a tiny part elf? Maybe he thinks Legolas is his real father