A couple of weeks ago, Gerrit failed his vision with the health department at school. Emma had failed hers a couple of years ago (post here) so I didn’t assume that this meant he needed glasses but we should definitely get him in to the eye doctor. We scheduled an appointment and after talking to Dan’s dad, decided that maybe Gerrit should go with him. My father in law needed a vision test and we thought it’d be good for Gerrit to watch him have his exam first so he didn’t freak out. Gerrit can be a stubborn bug when he wants to be and our thinking was that he would be on his best behavior for Grandpa, who registers up there with Santa Clause.
Great plan, right? Not so much. Gerrit still freaked out. He just kept saying how he didn’t want to go to the eye doctor and that he didn’t want to answer the questions. Peculiar thing to freak out about in my mind but knowing how he can fixate on a minute detail that means nothing to anybody else, I brushed it aside. “Too bad” was my answer when he cried he didn’t want to go. Emma assured him that it wouldn’t hurt but he kept saying how he didn’t want to answer the questions.
I won’t lie, getting out the door was ugly. Our brilliant plan of having Grandpa take him meant that I wouldn’t be there for the exam. So when I got a call later that said Gerrit needed glasses, I have to say I was surprised. It turns out that he has astigmatism in each eye. The eye dr said that he’s probably never seen clearly his whole life 😦 Poor buddy.
A mom’s natural born gift is to feel guilty and I quickly tuned mine in. I felt horrible that my little man has been struggling to see things clearly for his whole life and I never knew it. Suddenly, it made sense that he has a hard time with super fine motor skills like cutting on the line and writing his letters. If he can’t see it clearly, how could he? Of course, he had no way of knowing that the way he saw things up close wasn’t the same as everyone else so he couldn’t communicate that to us. But a mother will feel bad regardless of reason and so I’m still kicking myself that it took this long to find and correct this problem.
The one thing that gives me solace is how amazingly cute he looks with his glasses. I took some pictures but of course, they can’t do him justice. His adorable facial expressions he makes while talking to you are amplified by his glasses and it takes a lot of my will power to not kiss him every time he looks at me with those big eyes.
He was a little concerned about the kids at school making fun of him and he didn’t want me to take his picture for a few days so I know he’s slightly self conscious about them. He did finally tell me yesterday that I could take a picture yesterday and he must me feeling better about it because he just kept posing.
He says the glasses make everything ‘bigger’ and that he can see better. Right after we got home from picking them up, he sat at the table and started coloring all by himself. That has NEVER happened before. In fact, it was a source of contention between us. I would try to get him to color and he would fight me tooth and nail. I could NOT convince him to do it. So for him to pick up a crayon all on his own and start coloring away all on his own, brought tears to my eyes.