Breathe

The world, it spins so fast.  1040 miles/hr to be exact and yet, we don’t feel it.  We’re hurling through space almost half a kilometer a second and still we’re blissfully unaware.  I mean, we all know the earth is moving at an unfathomable rate but does it ever cross our minds?  Probably not.

It’s crossed mine a lot lately.  These days, I can feel its velocity with every waking minute.  With the blink of my eyes it shifts and changes, so quickly it steals my breath away.  It catapults me like a speeding rollercoaster, twisting and turning.  Rising and dropping, corkscrewing its way around, making my mind dizzy and clouded.

I feel myself being pulled and bumped this way and that, longing to stay still.  But there is no stillness.  The rides not over yet.  So I cling tightly to the safety bar before me.  Digging my nails in, squeezing my eyes closed to stop the spinning around me.  Shut it out but it doesn’t matter, I can still feel the bumps and bangs.  I brace myself for the next, knowing it will come.  And it does.

I can hear the cheers of those around me who are enjoying the ride.  They must be used to it.  They can predict its movement and there are no surprises to them.  For them, it’s a thrill and I question their sanity.  Have I just been on the ride too long?  Is that the difference between them and I?

The moments I have to spend thinking about it go by too quickly and they’re gone.  No time for thoughts, just movement.  The rides not over yet.  We slow for another hill.  Climb it, conquering ground.  At the top, there’s pause long enough for me to see the end.  I can see it in the distance.  Hang on, I tell myself it doesn’t look that far away.  Hang on…

We’ll all need to hang on indeed as we crest over the top of the hill and begin a speedy decent.  I feel myself lift from my seat and I tighten my grip on the bar.  Deep down, I know I won’t be tossed away but it comforts me to hold on to something strong and solid.

The wind, it whips at me and I feel gravity’s heavy pull.  It makes me tired… so very tired and I long to stand still.  To breathe in easy and touch softly the world around me.  To not feel jostled, yanked and thrown about but instead lay gently in comfort.

The ride, despite it’s speed, feels long.  And it’s not over yet.  Hang on, I say this time not just to myself but to the other people moving along through space with me.  Hang on… we aren’t done yet.  And when we get to the end, we might not recognize anything we left in the beginning.  Just hang on and breathe.

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About Chris

These are the pieces of my life and those that make it worth living
This entry was posted in Becoming, Me, Random Ramblings, Uncategorized, Woe is me and tagged , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

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