I will survive

People who live in glass houses shouldn’t throw stones and people who are afraid of heights shouldn’t clean gutters.” 

That was the thought that occurred to me on Saturday as I climbed up a ladder to do the disgusting deed.   Well, let me back up.  First, I had to build the ladder before I could climb it.  Now, I know you’re thinking ‘people don’t build ladders, chris, they buy them’ but this is one of those fancy ladders.  Ya know the kind

House of the rising son

Today was one of those character building days.  And by ‘character building’, I mean one of those parenting days when you wonder why you speak.  Have you had one yourself?  It’s that day when no matter how calmly or plainly you talk to your kids, they still don’t get it.  And so you try again but to no avail.  On this day, they can not hear you!!

Today was that day and as much as I tried, I just wasn’t getting through to Gerrit.  I’d speak purposefully and directly to him but he still wouldn’t respond.  I’d repeat myself over and over again but to no avail.  Finally at the end of my wits, I did what any good parent would do… I made threats of retaliation.  Here is the conversation as it unfolded…

Swimming

I never wanted to be an actress.  Well, let me be perfectly honest… there was a fleeting moment in 7th grade when I dared to think maybe I had a little something something.  I tried out for a beautiful maiden and ended up being a sailor.  At first being cast as a man, a sailor to boot, affirmed that I had about zero talent in that department.  It was slightly disappointing and made me wince to think I was that terrible.  But I convinced myself that it wouldn’t be sooo bad to be a boy.  It probably meant I had a tiny bit of talent if they thought that I could play a boy.  Me (or the 7th grade version of me at least)… a 5 foot pigmy with an overdeveloped chest and hair past her shoulders that defied gravity on a regular basis.  I decided if they believed my talent could overshadow ALL of that, well I must have something in me.  Yes, I saw it now… a hidden thespian, so deeply buried

Glad you came

I know you’ve all been eagerly waiting for an update on my Traverse City adventures but the thing about adventuring is that, if done right, it takes time to recover.  Life is a busy little thing and pictures take so very long to upload.  Enough excuses.  Here we go…

We arrived Friday around noon to find our

King of the road

Any person of mine doesn’t get the opportunity to say this to me often. In the spirit of adventure and bright ideas, I’m northward bound. Heading to Traverse City with my mother in law and my sister in law! Wine tasting, shopping and dining are on the agenda. Good times are sure to ensue.  Have a great weekend and try to miss me

Paradise

On a good day…

I sleep a uninterupted 8 hours of sleep, waking refreshed and ready to start the day again.  My skin looks flawless without make-up.  Not a zit in sight.  There are no dark circles under my eyes.  In fact, my eyes sparkle with the zeal of life.

I workout rigorously but still manage to have enough energy for using my arms in the shower that immediately follows.  There is no cellulite on my thighs and my arms don’t jiggle when I move them.  After my shower, I slip into my jeans.  I do not ever have to use the force of gravity

Kiss with a fist

Hi.  My name is Chris and as ridiculous as it sounds I have to admit that I’m addicted to